Episode 27 – The Bear and the Maiden Fair – Newbie Recap

Our resident newbie Oz of Thrones gives his thoughts and personal awards on last night’s episode. Check it out, after the break!

Spoiler note: The discussion in this post is primarily for non-book readers (book fans can discuss the show here). We ask all the series veterans to refrain from posting spoilers in the comments here, veiled or otherwise. This show is best viewed without knowing all the surprises beforehand, so please be respectful of your fellow fans. Thank you!

Oz of Thrones: Glad tidings from the inhabitants of House Oz, and Happy Belated Mother’s Day to all the WiC reading moms. Hope you all had a wonderful day and were able to spend it with friends and family, and it end it with a fantastic episode of GoT. I thought it was quite fitting that Talisa was depicted writing her mother a letter in this episode, and fathers everywhere were delighted that she did so with her naked buttocks in the air. Ozzette was treated to breakfast, fine gifts from her favorite cosmetic retail store, a few flowers from Highgarden, and a card I authored while wearing clothing, unlike Talisa. Oh, and she got to see Robb’s ass too.

Shall we start with the end? The final few minutes was “edge of the seat” type stuff. As regular viewers of GoT are well aware, the end can come for any character at any given time. This looked like it for Brienne. Jaime leaves with Bolton’s men headed to King’s Landing while Brienne is left to fend for herself with Locke and the boys. When Locke says to Jaime on his way out that he will take good care of her, it apparently weighs heavy on his mind and he is able to coerce Bolton’s men to go back to Harrenhall. He gets back as our lady of Tarth is getting the business from a big ass bear in a pit and jumps in to save her. Jaime manages to get her out and barely escapes having a foot torn off to match his hand. A confrontation with Locke follows, and as Bolton’s men have orders to get Jaime to King’s Landing, Jaime is allowed to leave again, only this time with Brienne in tow.

This scene was arguably the most intense of the season. When the bear punched Brienne right before Jaime arrived, I thought it was over, and Ozzette had to turn away. How the world of GoT turns…… when we started this series, the Kingslayer was not presented as someone who would be a likeable character. And now, we are rooting for him? A possible fan favorite of Season 3? Weird. Either way, the maiden fair was saved, thanks to this years’ unlikely hero, Jaime Lannister.

South of The Wall: Apparently it is much easier to climb down the Wall than it is going up. Interesting dialogue between Jon, Ygritte, Orell and Tormund as they begin their trek to Castle Black. When Jon says condescendingly to Ygritte, “You’re going to light the biggest fire the north has ever seen to let them know you’re coming” we get the well-known “You know nothing Jon Snow” quote from Ygritte again, as if to say that he has no idea what Mance has in store for the Crows. Later, Jon essentially tells Ygritte that they have no chance against the Night’s Watch. I have been thinking the same thing….. how can a small group of Wildlings defeat the many trained Crows? I realize the Watch is in some disarray, so this is probably the right time to strike. And we can now assume that Mance has some kind of elaborate plan in place. Or does he?

And Orell has a thing for Ygritte…… the dislike for Jon Snow seems to make more sense now.

On a side note, does anyone know where you can enroll for Professor Giantsbane’s sex education class? Tormund teaching Jon about being with a woman was quite amusing.

Gendry and Red: Melisandre finally reveals to Gendry who he is while sailing past the castle at King’s Landing. So, what exactly does she need from him? Blood? Sex for another shadow baby? And how in the hell will Stannis react?

Arya: Our favorite little warrior goes off on Beric Dondarrion about letting Gendry go, and then escapes into the woods for about ten seconds. She is then captured by the Hound who, oddly enough, hasn’t made it very far after being set free by the Brotherhood without Banners. My question here is, what does Clegane want with Arya? It seems like she would be more of a pain in his ass than anything.

The Daddy in the North: While waiting for the rain to let up, Robb finds out from Talisa that he will be a father. The group is on their way to the Frey’s for the wedding of the Frey daughter and Edmure, and Catelyn is concerned that the hold-up from the weather will put the arrangement with Walder Frey in jeopardy. Is she right? And what is Robb going to do when he finds out that James Bond Bolton has allowed Jaime to continue on to King’s Landing? Isn’t that betrayal? Didn’t Karstark lose his head over betrayal?

It’s not so bad, Sansa: Margaery tries to comfort Sansa about her upcoming marriage to Tyrion, and the understood intimacy that comes along with it, and suggests that the dwarf might be good at pleasing her. Awkward. This leads us to Tyrion, and Bronn (the subject of last weeks’ Raven Search Party). Good to see Tyrion’s most effective counselor back. Later, Tyrion and Shae discuss the marriage and she suggests they leave. Tyrion declines, and Shae leaves. Something tells me this Three’s Company idea is not going to work out for the half-man.

Grandson and Grandfather: We finally get a face to face meeting with the King and the Hand of the King, who doesn’t seem the least bit concerned about Dragons in the east. Joffrey wants to be included in the dealings of the small council, and looks to be scared as hell of Paw Paw Tywin. I thought at the beginning of the season that we may see a showdown between these two as Joffrey does not like to be told what to do by anyone. But the sadistic King seemed terrified by the Hand. Still, I get the feeling that this is not over and eventually Joffrey will do something to show that he is still in charge. Not Paw Paw.

And Finally, Dany…. What Are You Doing? I appreciate the fact that Dany wants to save the world from slavery. But come on sister. Making the slave leader from Yunkai (Razdal mo Eraz?) walk through the Unsullied on approach to meet with Dany was quite intimidating. And then to top that off, we get dragons on a couch?? Outstanding. Come on in Razdal. Have a seat. Make yourself at home. Can we get you something to drink? Classic stuff.

On a serious note, Razdal offers the ships that Dany needs. My opinion would be to load up the ships and take off. But Dany didn’t ask Lord Oz, so we are apparently going to hang out on the outskirts of Yunkai and wait for her to issue her version of an emancipation proclamation. Don’t misunderstand, I am all for the freeing of slaves everywhere. But wouldn’t it make more sense to get to Westeros with your entire army intact, conquer there, and then come back to take care of Yunkai business later? And then there is the powerful friends issue. Trouble is being brewed.

Oh, did you want your gold back? Nah….. you keep it.

Episode 307 Personal Awards
Favorite Scene: Brienne and the bear was quite intense as mentioned above, but I have to go with Dragons On a Couch.
Favorite Quote: “Oh, you mean right foot left foot right foot left foot right foot. You have trouble remembering that?” -Ygritte to Jon Snow, and the “Wet shit” quote from the Blackfish both made me chuckle quite a bit. OH… and the “Hodor” quote with pause for dramatic effect may have been the best ever!
Ow, That Shit Hurts Award: Did I not mention Theon above? Well that would be because he got tortured again, only this time our “Boy” put him in a scene from “Two Nurses and a Patient” porn movie, only to have his manhood taken off. Thank you GRRM and D&D for not showing it. Men everywhere slept better because of it.

Final Thoughts: Overall, I loved the episode. It was very well written, as was expected, and I am hoping we get more King and Paw Paw interaction soon (the preview looked awesome).

That being said, there are only three more episodes and it seems there are a LOT of loose ends to tie up. Presently, the irons in the fire include: four weddings and presumably some funerals, Dany and the Yunkai emancipation, Gendry and whatever the Red Woman does to him, the beating of the dead kracken mystery (Theon), the Odd Couple headed to KL again, Bran and Co. headed to the wall, Arya and her mean puppy, Fifty Shades of Jon and Ygritte, and the attack on the Wall just to name a few.

Of course, I don’t expect all of these story lines to be concluded by the end of the season. But I would like a few answers before we have to wait another nine and a half months.

That’s it for the Newbie Recap of Ep. 27! Remember, we are the Unsullied non-book readers here. NO SPOILERY IN THE COMMENTARY! If it involves the books, just don’t mention it.

A man will be traveling with Ozzette on Thursday for our annual 4 day trip with no Ozlings, where we will be enjoying music and plentiful amounts of adult beverages. I will try to crank out a Looking Forward Ep. 28 on Friday from our camp, should time allow and I am not acting like a drunk 20 year old.

Have a great week, and may there peace in your realm. -Oz

• Published on 05/13/2013 at 10:51 AM CDT
• Last updated on 10/21/2016 at 12:02 PM CDT