Westerosi Real Estate Assessments

How much would it cost to live in Westeros? Not as a peasant, mind you, or even as a Innkeep who happens to have situated himself at the right Crossroad. If you won the Westeros lottery and had your pick of castles, what would the price ranges be?

Let’s engage in a hypothetical exercise to help things along. Imagine that Westeros’ aristocratic families fell on hard times post Winter-World War (as we see happening in Downton Abbey), and had to put their houses on the market for new money upstarts. Imagine that Downton Abbey’s Sir Richard Carlisle (played by Iain “Ser Jorah” Glen), a self-made man with plenty of money, was in the market for a good house. If he and Lady Mary (his rebound engagement, post-Daenerys rejection) started looking in Westeros instead of York, how much would they have to shell out for a fixer-upper like Harrenhal?

That was the question London & Country Mortgages strove to answer as they took their real estate expertise and applied it to the Westerosi market. Here are their findings.

With Petyr Baelish having just left the Eyrie for parts unknown, the lady of the castle having plunged to her death, and her son not really up to the task of running it, this place is ripe for turn over. As a buyer, you’d be treated to gorgeous mountain vistas and sky cells for anyone who irritates you, be it your own siblings or dirty rotten scoundrels hellbent on ruining your reputation. At £11.9 million, this seems like a bargain.

Perhaps owning a piece of The Wall sounds like a dream to some. But with bitter unending cold and those “interesting” neighbors, I’d think £11.8 million was slightly overvaluing the property. Historical legacy aside, we all know the real story of any property is location, and in a bad neighborhood with White Walker hoodies and thugs, it’s worth it to pay a little extra to go elsewhere.

Harrenhal is valued far higher than our first two properties, despite the necessary overhauls, due to the size of the property, as well as the potential land value. This is far from a move-in ready investment. If one does shell out £500 million for it, they better have a nice summer home in Highgarden or Dorne to stay in while contractors over run the place.

Heading north again, Winterfell was a fine old castle with a storied history that goes all the way back to the building of The Wall. Unfortunately, the place has fallen on hard times, and the current land leasers are looking to unload it to pay for lawsuits stemming from the son’s erratic behavior. Like Harrenhal, this is a fixer upper, and has been been valued lower as a result. £200 million doesn’t seem a bad price for it, considering the acres upon acres of the north that are included in the transaction, not to mention that one of the features is the rare on-site Godswood that has not had the weirwood tree taken down–private gardens like that in a northern climate are something of a necessity. Again, buying this does mean that one should have a secondary place to stay while work is being done. But I’d say it’s worth it.

The Red Keep was always going to be priced higher due to the urban location, Lannister inflation, and the Area Medium Income (AMI) running higher (for King’s Landing’s 1% crowd, I believe the AMI runs about 280%). Still, the jump in price here is notable. Though King’s Landing seems like a sun-dappled ideal, it’s also a potential target for attack by errant claimants to the throne, and the lord of the Red Keep is expected to manage the full city’s upkeep, which includes sorely neglected areas like Flea Bottom. Also, although the Red Keep itself has plenty of staff, city services have been badly neglected by the former tenants (They were evicted for several years of non-payment when it was discovered the mines under their home hadn’t been producing gold for decades). So not only will the building itself set you back £1billion, but there are several hidden costs involved.

For those looking for something not quite so budget busting, the Twins–two castles for the price of one–is a major bargain at only £134 million. Unlike Harrenhal, this place is move-in ready, income is guaranteed due to the river being zoned as part of the property, and toll fees are completely privatized. It’s not always spring here, but for those who prefer to have seasons where they live, this might be just the right place. Though the Twins are set up for entertaining, the last tenants gave the place a reputation, so a few open house events to mellow things out would not be remiss by the new owners.

For those who just aren’t happy with Westeros, what with its punishing winteres and looming White Walker invasions, we also invite you to consider properties on the continent of Essos. Now, Meereene is not an ideal commute by any means, but for the price of living a little further out than you might have originally thought, you can have a full on pyramid, and Air Targaryen is a reliable mode of transport on days when telecommuting just isn’t going to cut it.

• Published on 04/17/2015 at 9:30 AM CDT
• Last updated on 10/21/2016 at 1:05 PM CDT